Dear Future Husband…..

I know you are out there somewhere. I may not know who you are right now. I do want to know who you are but I do know I am not ready to be married right now. I also know that I want to get married in the future but right now is definitely not for me. 

I have been single for a little over two years now since the last serious relationship I was in. I am happy that I am single right now. I do not think I am ready to be in a relationship at the moment. I know when we meet, we will know that it will be forever. I hope you will give me a lot of patience and love with what I have dealt with in the past. I am still trying to recover from that serious relationship. I do still get angry at times about what happened.

For some reason, when I have been on dates with guys I have been nitpicking everything about the guy. It has been bugging me that I have been doing that with every single guy. I am getting tired of that. I feel like kicking myself for going out on the dates with all of those guys as well as nitpicking everything about them.

I have been thinking of questions on how I met you, have I met you back in elementary school, and much more. I wonder how we will met or if we already have met. It would be crazy if we met back in elementary school. I have this gut feeling that it is probably not how we meet at all. 

Just let me tell you this, I am excited for the future holds for the both of us. I know we will go through thick and thin together. We will grow more as an individual and as a couple. I know we will have a lot of fun together and enjoy life together.

How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

Losing a guy very quickly is not a good thing. If you want a man to stay in your life then there are some things to avoid if you’re trying to keep him around.

For instance, in the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days one of the ladies said that she loved him the second day that they have known each other. For one, she did say that she wanted to express her feelings. To a certain extent that is a good thing to express your feelings. You have to wait and see if the guy will last longer than 10 days.

If the guy seems disconnected then he is definitely a no go for dating for more than a month. How you can tell that he will most likely stay in your life is by seeing if he is not really distant.

Douche bag, player type of guys have the confident, condescending feel towards them. It will be harder to keep those type of guys around and a definitely stay away for boyfriends.

The men that you want to go for is the ones that will be willing to change those things about themselves and willing to grow more with you.

A guy who is more positive one a lot of different outlooks is always more of the go to boyfriend because the outlook for the relationship will last longer and will have a better effect for growing as a person for both him and yourself.

Another key thing about when you first meet a guy is to keep your standards high. If someone says lower your standards then they aren’t really there to support you in the long run. I had a past boyfriend who said to me that I had way too high of standards. That is another topic for another time. 

If you lower your standards for someone then you are not staying true to yourself.

Another idea is if you have sex within the first 2 dates then its another sign he would not talk to you anymore and seem distant after that. What I suggest is wait after like 10 dates or more to have sex. If you are one of those people who is saving that side of the relationship until you are married then that is awesome. Tell the guy you are not wanting a one night stand and want a true relationship with the guy. 

By doing that he will evaluate if you are worth the wait. Some guys will think if you are not worth it then they wont continue with you. 

If they seem like they are always focused on working then they are most likely focused on themselves and other women. You do not want a man that is focused on themselves and other women. 

What I suggest is writing down what you want in a guy and in a relationship. It will help you get clarity on some 0f the things that you want in the future. Stay true to yourself, and what you want. It will definitely help you in the long run.

Super Power

You might be wondering why I titled this post super power. By the end, you will understand why it’s called that. 

Everyone in their life will fall in love and have a crush on someone at some point. When having a crush it happens a lot in elementary school and then it decreases over time. Basically years from when you had the crush, you might think the crush that you had was not that cute compared to the stage of life that you are now. You may say something like,” Dang, he is ugly! How did I have a crush on him on point blank so many years ago.”

Everyone has a super power of falling in love with someone at some point in their life. At times it can be hard to find your one true love. There are stories out their that people met their significant other when they were really young, or when they were in high school, or met in college. There is some stories about people meeting when they are in their 40’s or older.

Love is everyone’s super power. Everyone just has to learn how to use it and what it means to love.

Nicknames

Everyone makes nicknames for their significant other when they are in relationships. Of course, some nicknames can be cute and sweet. Depending on the nickname it can be taken too far. 

When you say a certain nickname it can get annoying after a certain period of time. The period of time isn’t really calculated or determined I should say. How someone can get annoyed is by how you say it and how you mean it. Of course, you can say pookie bear but in reality it maybe not the ideal nickname that the person wants.

In the end, ask what they think of nicknames. Just generally talk about it with them. Ask them what some common nicknames and see what they think about them.

A nickname that comes from the heart is always the best solution in the end. If you do not mean it in the end then dont say it. Typically if you say it from the heart then the relationship will last longer.

Finding Out Signals

If your a guy like me you would understand that it could be difficult to figure out what the girl your with tries to discreetly signal you about something. You try very hard to interpret the signal though you don’t always get it right. The way she looks at you or the jesters that she makes there is so many that is hard to understand them all. She might say one thing but actually means something else entirely. The most difficult thing of all is that each girl has their own signals so that makes it more of a challenge to figure girls out. Though the ends justifies the means as we guys might not fully understand girls but they always make life more interesting.

Accepting

Accepting can be talked about in a lot of different ways. For instance, accepting something about yourself can be hard when you grew up in an environment where it was all negative about body image. Yes that is hard but that’s not really the aspect that I am going to be talking about today. In a relationship, it’s important to accept who you are as a person and everything about the person who you are with. It’s not something that is a major key in a relationship but it does help in a relationship.

Having a significant other that is willing to help you to get to the point of loving your looks will definitely help. In a relationship, you have to accept each other for who they are. Which is a major key in any relationship you have with someone including yourself. 

Getting Hopes Up

I was talking to a guy for a long time thinking he and I would last forever. In the end, he wasn’t what I expected. He didn’t tell me that he isn’t a believer in God anymore. He said it’s a scam and doesn’t want to be apart of it. In my case, I am a Christian who wants to have friends who are believers and want to marry a guy who is strong in his faith as much as I am or even more of a believer. 

I can get my hopes up easily and sometimes I have to remind myself that something like that would happen again possibly. Not everyone is like me who wants to marry a fellow Christian. I have made a list of qualities that I want in a future husband several times before and it helps me with my standards for a man. Don’t lose hope on finding your true love.

Its Natural

I always used to joke around my friends and tease them by saying “All for one, one for all”. It was hard for me to explain this quote to everyone in my school, to everyone in my family and also among my younger generation. I have never discovered why it is hard, but I do often get asked are you single? Do you have girlfriend? Sometime you have to say Yes because here everyone expects you to have one. But one day I pulled this student Named Krishna for coffee talk. And I asked him about his experiences. He told me simply:

“Dude this is natural”.

I paused and thought about it, why it is natural to you and not to me. May be he believes that concept learned from personal experiences often present feelings of attraction towards other.  I asked him what is “Feelings of attraction”? “Dude this is natural” he said it again. Then this student Krishna opened up and he told me “love is god and god is love”. I thought myself lucky this student who has got name called Krishna. Krishna the Hindu god that represent love, blessings and teaching.

I asked him, how is she?, How does she look? He said me she has bright face, great smile and lovely eyes where entire world is hidden. She can present variety of looks but one of the classy look that has been highlight for me the day she had green shirt, with tied hair and beats headphone on.  I asked him how in the world you remember all this stuffs?

He again replied “Dude this is natural”

I asked him How the does it feel like feeling love? He said have you experienced wind?, I said i just walk in to this location blessed by Miles per hour wind which. He said yes, its like wind who comes and hit you. He also said that she mentioned him  about “Oklahoma wind”, that comes and exert force on you. He asked me you know why? I replied “Krishna that is just natural”. He laughed, i saw emotion in his face. Although I have not seen his girlfriend I could see her in his face.

After he left I kept on thinking about that lady, she must be god of joy and happiness. After all my professor once said “our deeper understanding of our inner feelings gives us clear philosophical concepts”. Yes after all it is natural. Whether you see her in person or whether you have never seen her I do know I have feelings for that lady. Yes, she is somewhere in this world waiting for me. Because god has chosen her for me and god has chosen me for her. Yes it is Natural and yes its is true god is love and love is god.

 

 

Thanksgiving

As everyone knows thanksgiving is around the corner. It would be so cool to have a man to bring with you to the family meal. That is only if you had a special man in your life that you want to do it with. In my case, I only have guy friends and they aren’t that type of guy that is special enough to me. Of course, my this time in my life a lot of people are talking, dating, engaged, married and/or have kids already. I keep on seeing all of these Christmas movies on the hallmark channel. With a lot of those movies, there is a woman that is single or just broke up or broke off the engagement that she was in or her husband passed away then she moves or goes on a trip in the movie. When she is on the tip or in the new town she meets this special guy. She maybe stubborn and then falls in love with him. Well typically in the end they fall in love. I wish that has happened but it hasn’t happened. Yes I wish that type of thing happens. It may happen to some people but it doesn’t happen to everyone. It gets your hopes up for the holidays but some how you have to remind yourself that it may not happen. Also, if there was this hot guy then he might act like a jerk and not talk to you after so long. He might not reply the next day that you meet or he might. All in the end, you always want to stay true to yourself and it is okay to be single over the holidays. Yes it would be great to get your significant other some gifts but you just have to give it time to actually find that special someone.